Wednesday, 27 July 2016

Small type...

As we're clearly 'of a certain age', the fragrant Mrs O'Blene and I regularly get those confounded leaflets for items like stair lifts (good idea, but not yet), and all things to do with how to spend our huge pension pots, or asking for money for some cheridee or something! We also apparently need solar panels, which are a fashion accessory we hadn't really considered of late, and also we're told how Tunbridge Wells approaches 'diversidee', which is also an anathema, as we didn't realise that our home town - or near miss -, actually had any reason to be diverse any more!

But the latest one intrigues me, and as it's for a big UK name, and one I ought to warn you about it.

It's for English Heritage, and they want more than fifty notes to join. The leaflet quite rightly defines the richness of our country, and how there are hundreds of different venues to visit.

But there's one snag, and I wonder if either of you can spot the problem...?


Each 'venue' is printed in such small letters that you need a microscope to see them!

Someone, somewhere, in the dripping nauseous cellars where all National Heritage workers are bolted to the wall, may well wonder why there are no takers, as people like the O'Blenes can't actually read their blurb because the old glasses are not capable of squinting at such a small print!

I blame Brexit of course, and probably, so does the BBC and the Gud Rhianna and also, oh what, any other silly rag or prog where nobody understands late-middle aged normal people..;0)

I wouldn't actually know, of course, as I don't listen to or read either or any of them!


rvi said...

"Age shall not wither them" ... I am talking about eyes of course. Hah!!

I couldn't agree more with you Scrobs. I have worn "multi-focal" lenses for donkeys years and by and large they are good, with the close view at the bottom and distance view at the top. The problem is trying to locate exactly the point of focus needed when at an intermediate distance. From where my comfy armchair is located, I am unable to read the tiny ticker-tape runners which scroll or plonk themselves at the bottom of the tv screen - and we have a 42"er which sits astride its own bit of furniture - without jiggling my specs up or down a bit. In the end I just give up. Moving closer also makes them work perfectly, but then the armchair would be sitting right in the middle of the area where all the traffic passes - and I would naturally get shouted at by SWIMBO for cluttering place up!

I also have a minor but irritating difficulty now with my latest pair as they foreshorten distance, so when I park between the beautifully painted lines on the car park floor, I see that I am right up against the wall or the car in front, but when I get out I see that I still have at least 3 or more feet of space in front of me (which then incurs sarky comments from my passengers who have no comprehension of the difficulties I am enduring).

To read the 6-font print on leaflets, flyers or newspaper ads, I have to remove my specs and bring the paper up to within a couple of inches of my nose in order to read the content. Again, I usually end up by actually not bothering with it anyway.

Never mind, c'est la vie, non? .. and at this stage of life, it is entirely up to me to decide whether to read things or not.

A K Haart said...

Maybe you need a pair of Zoomies.

rvi said...

Ha ha!! Looks like they need a touch more development, but thanks for the suggestion AK.

Michael said...

My glasses have four different lenses as apparently, I'm supposed to need them.

In fact, instead of paying lots for specs in future, I may just as well get a pair for a tenner from my local chemist, and spend the saved cash on mind-enhancing tinctures, which really do make the world rosier...

Michael said...

Like the idea of Zoomies, Mr H!

Whatever happened to virtual reality?

Electro-Kevin said...

We've had the solar panels shite.

Worked out that the money was better spent on a more economical boiler and car.

Michael said...

At my tender age, Elecs, I'd definitely agree with you!

At your tender age, I'd also agree with you as well!