Sunday, 9 May 2010

Karmageddon and other new words...

The Washington Post's Mensa Invitational once again invited readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition.

Here are the winners:

1. Cashtration (n): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.

2. Ignoranus : A person who's both stupid and an asshole.

3. Intaxicaton : Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

4. Reintarnation : Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

5. Bozone (n): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

6. Foreploy : Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.

7. Giraffiti : Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

8. Sarchasm : The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

9. Inoculatte : To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

10. Osteopornosis : A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

11. Karmageddon : It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.

12. Decafalon (n): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.

13. Glibido : All talk and no action.

14. Dopeler Effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

15. Arachnoleptic Fit (n): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

16. Beelzebug (n): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

17. Caterpallor (n): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.


rvi said...

The usual annual brilliance! I always look forward to this publication.

Just what is needed to take one's mind off the recent illection....

Scrobs... said...

Yer right Reevers.

'Illection' - love it!

I feel the whole issue is utterly depressing. We have projects just waiting to go, and investors will not budge until they know whether we'll get some sort of leadership and a stable future to depend on.

Luckily, Brown is certain to back down soon, and I'm revving myself up to get ratted that day.

killemallletgodsortemout said...

I have the champagne in the fridge, ready to pop as soon as the mong leaves the bunker.

Philipa said...

Excellent, Scrobs.

Scrobs... said...

Killers, I'll join you!

Bet I'll reach the fridge before you, but as is the norm, we'll share the proceeds - and I'll bring the next round!

Just imagine what odious people ike Ed Balls would be doing now, if only the lumpen electorate hadn't been so totally thick.

Scrobs... said...

Thatnks Pips, I really hope you can see a positive future with, perhaps - someone who will make a difference, and not force you down every time you want to rise up and wave your front legs!

Go for it Gal!

Philipa said...

"front legs", Scrobs? Have you been playing with mirrors? Many men have tried to explain woman but playing with mirrors isn't the way to do it. Thanks for your encouragement though :-)

Scrobs... said...

I wouldn't even want to start to understand Pips, it's much easier for everyone that way!

Some questions are best left unanswered...

Philipa said...

Pink moon, Scrobs.

By the way, I hope you like the soundtrack on my latest. It's a bit risque though.

Calfy said...

Brilliant Scrobs. I'd have missed this if you hadn't posted it, despite my acute logolepsis.

Trubes said...

Hello Darling Scrobs,
I know I'm a bit late but, how about?
....Browned off.. Ex Prime Minster raises his hat!