Thursday, 10 September 2009

Thoughtful - I really did think again...

Subject: WHY I (sometimes) FORWARD JOKES

This explains why I forward jokes.

A man and his dog were walking along a road. The man was enjoying the scenery, when it suddenly occurred to him that he was dead.

He remembered dying, and that the dog walking beside him had been dead for years, and he wondered where the road was leading them.

After a while, they came to a high, white stone wall along one side of the road. It looked like fine marble. At the top of a long hill, it was broken by a tall arch that glowed in the sunlight.

When he was standing before it he saw a magnificent gate in the arch that looked like mother-of-pearl, and the street that led to the gate looked like pure gold. He and the dog walked toward the gate, and as he got closer, he saw a man at a desk to one side.

When he was close enough, he called out, 'Excuse me, where are we?'

'This is Heaven, sir,' the man answered. 'Wow! Would you happen to have some water?' the man asked.

Of course, sir. Come right in, and I'll have some ice water brought right up.'The man gestured, and the gate began to open.

'Can my friend,' gesturing toward his dog, 'come in, too?' the traveller asked.

'I'm sorry, sir, but we don't accept pets.'

The man thought a moment and then turned back toward the road and continued the way he had been going with his dog.

After another long walk, and at the top of another long hill, he came to a dirt road leading through a farm gate that looked as if it had never been closed. There was no fence.

As he approached the gate, he saw a man inside, leaning against a tree and reading a book.

'Excuse me!' he called to the man. 'Do you have any water?'

'Yeah, sure, there's a pump over there, come on in.'

'How about my friend here?' the traveller gestured to the dog.

'There should be a bowl by the pump.'

They went through the gate, and sure enough, there was an old-fashioned hand pump with a bowl beside it.

The traveller filled the water bowl and took a long drink himself,
then he gave some to the dog.

When they were full, he and the dog walked back toward the man who
was standing by the tree.

'What do you call this place?' the traveller asked.

'This is Heaven,' the man answered.

'Well, that's confusing,' the traveller said. 'The man down the road said that was Heaven, too.'

'Oh, you mean the place with the gold street and pearly gates? Nope; that's Hell.'

'Doesn't it make you mad for them to use your name like that?'

'No, we're just happy that they screen out the folks who would leave their best friends behind.'

Soooo...

Sometimes, we wonder why friends keep forwarding jokes to us without writing a word and maybe this will explain.

When you are very busy, but still want to keep in touch, guess what you do? You forward jokes.

When you have nothing to say, but just want to keep in contact, you forward jokes.

When you have something to say, but don't know what, and don't know how, you forward jokes.

Also to let you know that you are still remembered, you are still important, you are still loved, you are still cared for, guess what you get?

A forwarded joke.

So, next time if you get a joke, don't think that you've been sent just another forwarded joke, but that you've been thought of today and your friend on the other end of your computer wanted to send you a smile.

I was going to bin this, but felt it was worth an airing...

30 comments:

Thud said...

A rather cheering little tale.

lilith said...

:-)

Scrobs... said...

Thanks Thudders, I felt a bit squeamish about this one; but, have to admit that I was on JRT walking duty that morning, and we're both big pals!

Hand up here - probably a no-no amongst the majority, but that's the way I think, and so does Scrobs...

And JRT!

Scrobs... said...

Lils - you're the best at understatement!

Means a lot that does...

rvi said...

We all do it; I get them daily from a variety of sources, but those few I do forward are carefully selected by content and recipient - the rest get deleted on receipt. I intend to forward the link to this post to quite a few friends as they will appreciate it, so thanks for posting it.

Now back to pruning the chillis...

Scrobs... said...

Reevers, I get fed up with the ones which chuck in a 'religious' statement near the end.

This one caught my eye simply from the opening para, so I got drawn down to the end!

The latest one from one particular chum is about a certain Doctor Dave sleeping with one of his patients and feeling very guilty...

electro-kevin said...

I'm feeling a bit guilty now.

Philipa said...

Excellent post, Scrobs. Very true :-)

The Lakelander said...

A good story, Scrobs!

Modo said...

Q: Did you hear about the morning-after pill for men
A: It changes your blood group

rvi said...

I agree Scrobs, I too don't like those religious or other do-gooding bits at the end of otherwise good or amusing efforts. Got this today from a mate. I had seen it before but on the off-chance it may be new to you out in the sticks...

NEW WORLD SURVEY

Last month a world-wide telephone survey was conducted by the UN. The only question asked was:-

"Would you please give your honest opinion about solutions to the food shortage in the rest of the world?"

The survey was a huge failure because of the following:

In Eastern Europe they didn't know what "honest" meant.

In Western Europe they didn't know what "shortage" meant.

In Africa they didn't know what "food" meant.

In China they didn't know what "opinion" meant.

In the Middle East they didn't know what "solution" meant.

In South America they didn't know what "please" meant.

In the US they didn't know what "the rest of the world" meant.


And finally............ In Australia they hung up because they couldn't understand the Indian accent of the researcher.


I shall now hastily exit left with with gaberdine and wellies (which if you spell check in Word asks whether you meant "willies").

Scrobs... said...

Reevers - Corbieres to be extracted from keyboard with sponge (then re-decanted back into receptacle)!

Absolutely marvellous!

I'll tell Mrs S about the Indian researcher, because she beats me up every time we get someone telling her (while she's minding her own business), that she should listen to a few words........ (sound of phone being hurled onto electric thing with small electrodes which seems to work on cutting unwanted callers off in their prime)...

I still get beaten up, but then; I really enjoy it...!

Should we blog this - with your Hat Tip of course, and as long as you don't mind me calling you Reevers...?

Great post you did there - still giggling...!

Scrobs... said...

Modo - Old friend!

Are you back from The Solent now?

Doris emailed me in a quandary only yesterday, and I fear that Bunts would like a word or three as well...

She's little raver you know!

Nice statement, I'll get a translation from Wikipedia..

Scrobs... said...

Thanks Pips, I'd hoped that this post wouldn't offend your - er - legs in your latest!

You've done this before... I really, really like that picture!!

Hope all's well 'Our Kid' - I'm sure that you're holding a glass of Photoshopped Chateau de Chastellain 1987...;0)

Scrobs... said...

Lakes; we really need to think on ways to make people less miserable these days!

'Tween you an' me, on Thursday, I had to be at a meeting in Grays Inn Rd, at three o' clock.

Now that's bad news, as I live in deepest Kent, and I have to screw all my work at home into two hours, before I belt off to the smoke.

So, wallet in hand, I said, 'Sod it, I'll go early and break a few doors down (metaphorically speaking...).

Arriving at Charing Cross three hors before my meeting, it took me only five seconds to say to myself, 'Ring a mate for a beer'!

And so it happened, and several charges of large glasses later, I was well in for the meeting, where we won hands down!

So; all tis bollocks about 'phone a friend', has actually come from people who need to do this for a living!

Must keep talking to people, that way you eventually win - but it's hard...even with a couple of pints...

Scrobs... said...

Elecs, if there's one chum who doesn't need to feel guilty - ite You!

I so much like what you do so just keep going eh?

Don't ask what will happen if my (our) latest venture goes pear shaped...

Just don't...

Scrobs... said...

Pippadoolicaniosus...

You're shining light in all this, and thanks so much for showing me your 'leg' photograph again...

You know damn well that I'm a 'leg man'... You BAD GIRL!

I don't really know what to say next...

rvi said...

Scrobs: If you wish to blog it feel free - and call me what you will - sticks and stones etc.. :o)

Daisy said...

I have gotten this one a few times and still read it every time...it is also why i forward jokes as well...i guess sometimes i just want people to know i still think of them fondly and still remember them...no matter how far apart or how long since the contact...
i read once that the lack of contact we have with others doesn't eliminate the care and concern for that person...recently, i have had that proved to me...and thank you scrobs :)

Daisy said...

btw i did post :)

Philipa said...

Thanks, Scrobs. They did take attention from my curly hair, big nose, crooked teeth, weak chin and less than enormous bust. With all the stress my face now seems to hang off the bridge of my nose and I smell slightly of sweat and panic. Ah well, we can't all be beautiful. But your lovely comments make me smile, even if it is like a flower in a bomb site.

Philipa said...

Oh yeah, your answer is posted over at my place ;-)

Scrobs... said...

Reevers - you're on the list!

No probs re sticks and stones, this is a family site - except where politicians are concerned that is...

Scrobs... said...

Daisers! How are things over there?

I even went to find your phone number to text some gibberish, and here you are!

Most of the stuff we seem to get is far too schmaltzy and often very squirmly.

This one started so well, it got the benefit of the doubt...

You take care eh?

Scrobs... said...

Pips...

"They did take attention from my curly hair, big nose, crooked teeth, weak chin and less than enormous bust."

Don't believe you and, from that pic, definitely don't agree...!

Bummer days will soon end believe me!

Hang on in eh?

Philipa said...

"Bummer days", hee hee, you make me laugh, Scrobs.

Thank you x

Blue Eyes said...

Ooh I'm going to steal this and forward it to people ;-)

Daisy said...

scrobs, i would love a text from you and yes i would respond!

Trubes said...

I liked that Scrobs, so true too!

An old friend of mine started e-mailing really filthy jokes to me on a 'round robin' basis, which meant my e-mail address was on the top of the copy, along with everyone else, who she was e-mailing her smut to.
Don't get me wrong, old Trubiedoo is no prude, but I wasn't happy about my e-mail address being published and particularly being associated with 'porno' jokes.
Eventually, I asked her not to send any more, which she didn't, but has severed communications with me.
Some friend !

Hope you and Mme. Scrobs are enjoying the lovely warm weather...We even barbecued yesterday!

Di.x

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