Tuesday, 26 July 2022

Battle for the keys to the broom cupboard...

 

So it's official!

The race to become Chairman of Sodden Prickney Parish Council has begun in earnest! In a few week's time, Norman Wibble and Cynthia Molestrangler will know who gets the keys to the village hall, well, in fact so will everyone else, as the final two Councillors in the vote are Ron Groat and Amelia Newt!

It's been a dirty campaign so far, partly due to the lack of cleaners in the village, and Dr Norbert Iodine's dog continuing to bring his collection of fleas into the committee room! But apart from that, the dramatic exit of Edwina Baggage, who played a blinder in the run-up to the debate by appearing in a German uniform and slapping her jackboot with a swagger-stick, and Len Belch, who forgot to turn up for the public debate (attended by seven villagers), with the chairman, PC Lumbersnatch, it looks as though there's a possibility that Basil Kalashnikov will lock himself in the broom-cupboard and refuse to come out!

There is evidence of this, by virtue of an electric bull-horn being attached to the 13amp plug by the water dispenser, through which the standard bellowed recourse of "Sod everybody", will be heard before the door is smashed down by PC Lumbersnatch and his Sergeant, and the offending machine, plus Mr Kalashnikov will be admitted to cell No 4 down at the station!

It's all slightly worrying for the village, as up to now, bugger-all has been done about anything, and if Ron and Ms Newt (Ron's Sunday squeeze) have to battle it out, one of them is certainly going to withdraw those special favours until the next chairman has to be appointed, probably in a few week's time!

Tuesday, 19 July 2022

Birthday Honours...



Scrobs has just discovered that his birthday (today) is shared with David Lammy and Nicola Sturgeon, as well as PC Lumbersnatch and Illie Nastase!

I don't mind Brian May as we're exactly the same age and I still wish I could play guitar like he does, and I also wish Simon Cadell was still around as we liked him a lot in 'Hi de Hi'!

Platinum, schlatinum, who cares if you'll never see 74 again...

Tuesday, 12 July 2022

Contrivative Condidates...


  • Amelia Newt
  • Cynthia Molestrangler
  • Norman Wibble
  • PC Lumbersnatch
  • Pastor Gilbert Flange
  • Elder Lungeburt
  • Toniatteline Sagtrouser
  • Len Belch
  • Frambreline Gruntrasher
  • Prunella Lunge-Dachsund
  • Brunhilde Gunke
  • Countess Wilbertine-Starkers
  • Nurse Fabriola Cruntstable
  • Lady ffiona Horseperson
  • Wimbert Lump
  • Edwina Baggage
  • Basil Kalashnikov
  • Ron Groat
  • Dr. Norbert Iodine
Hondootedly, the door below will belong to one of the aboves...





Friday, 8 July 2022

Goolies...

 For a regular laugh, we always click on this clip...



It surfaced again only yesterday...

BBC humour was so good back then, useless nowadays of course!

Tuesday, 28 June 2022

Robbery assault and battery...



I don't know why, but this track seems to occur every time I get into the shed for some serious 'work'...

I have a tape player Sellotaped to the ceiling, and my collection of favourite music is stored in an old briefcase nearby. This song is still a firm favourite after all these years - Elder Daught bought it for me for Christmas ages ago!

Although there's some confusion as to who played what in the final takes, Bill Bruford and Chester Thompson were still in the arena, and Phil Collins was helping out as well, but his singing was magical!

I love the synthesizer break from 4.10, and wonder if Steve Hacket really did contribute as much, or maybe was sounded out, but he certainly does cut the mustard these days - my doctor saw him a few months ago, and he was just fabulous!

A 'Trick of the Tail' is still a seminal album and deserves a listen from start to finish!





Monday, 20 June 2022

Turning point...

Back in the sixties, when I was living in London, I sometimes got a lift into Westminster with my flatmate,who would drive up Fulham Road at a terrifying rate of knots, and we'd arrive in Buckingham Gate about three minutes later, as he was indeed a speedy driver...

One part of the journey, at the end, has always intrigued me though... His office had an underground car park, and the idea was that he would drive down the ramp at roughly the same speed as he'd been doing on the way in, and hit the bottom with a screech of brakes. 

And then, the car began to turn sideways all on its own! It took me some time to appreciate how all this was happening, as I'd be holding my face in my hands, and had both feet jammed in the front of the foot well!

It was one of these...




There was no effort involved, as the momentum of the car arriving on the plate at around 100mph was enough to twist it so that it was easy to drive off to the right without fiddling about with a three-point turn!

Nifty eh?

Tuesday, 14 June 2022

Thought...

 


I was sent this by an old school friend from years ago. I knew his brother much better, as he was the same age as me, and we were in the same form and dormitory, so I suppose that means we always got on well - which we did!

As Scrobs approaches the Platinum Years next month, it seems right to let the writings of others articulate a few sentiments, and for me to do a bit of listening for a change.

Here's the piece: - 

What Will Matter? (by Michael Josephson)

Ready or not, some day it will all come to an end.
There will be no more sunrises, no minutes, hours or days.
All the things you collected, whether treasured or forgotten
will pass to someone else.
Your wealth, fame and temporal power will shrivel to irrelevance.
It will not matter what you owned or what you were owed.
Your grudges, resentments, frustrations
and jealousies will finally disappear.
So too, your hopes, ambitions, plans and to-do lists will expire.
The wins and losses that once seemed so important will fade away.
It won’t matter where you came from
or what side of the tracks you lived on at the end.
It won’t matter whether you were beautiful or brilliant.
Even your gender and skin color will be irrelevant.

So what will matter?
How will the value of your days be measured?

What will matter is not what you bought
but what you built, not what you got but what you gave.
What will matter is not your success
but your significance.

What will matter is not what you learned
but what you taught.
What will matter is every act of integrity,
compassion, courage, or sacrifice
that enriched, empowered or encouraged others
to emulate your example.

What will matter is not your competence
but your character.
What will matter is not how many people you knew,
but how many will feel a lasting loss when you’re gone.
What will matter is not your memories
but the memories that live in those who loved you.
What will matter is how long you will be remembered,
by whom and for what.

Living a life that matters doesn’t happen by accident.
It’s not a matter of circumstance but of choice.
Choose to live a life that matters.