IF YOU MARRY AN IRISH GIRLThe first man married a woman from Italy. He told her that she was to do the dishes and house cleaning. It took a couple of days but on the third, he came home to see a clean house and the dishes put away.The second man married a woman from Poland. He gave his wife orders that she was to do all the cleaning, dishes and cooking. The first day he didn’t see any results but the next day it was better. By the third day he saw his house was clean, the dishes were done and there was a huge dinner on the table.The third man married a girl from Ireland. He ordered her to keep the house clean, dishes washed, lawn mowed, laundry done and hot meals on the table for every meal. He said the first day he didn’t see anything, the second day he didn’t see anything but by the third day, some of the swelling had gone down and he could see a little out of his left eye and his arm was healed enough that he could make himself a sandwich and load the dishwasher. He still has some difficulty when he goes for a widdle.
Lots of mentions for good chums and family, comment on politicians' failure, more fun than seriousness and tinctures for all...
My dear old mum comes from that school...Liverpool Irish but much the same thing.
ReplyDeleteHo ho...
ReplyDeleteThere are lots of "funnies" on youchoob along the lines of your post eg:
One year, I decided to buy my mother-in-law a cemetery plot as
a Christmas gift...
The next year, I didn't buy her a gift.
When she asked me why, I replied,
"Well, you still haven't used the gift I bought you last year!"
And that's how the fight started.
Great grandmother was Irish (mother's side) And all the women in that line (especially Mum) are the sweetest ladies.
ReplyDeleteThere was another Irish lady in my gran's street who got into a row and threw a leg of lamb at her man - he ducked and it went out of the window. Gran used to regale us with the punchline "and do you know what ? It was the tenderist piece of meat we ever had."
Oh. And I do recall Mum losing her temper on a very rare occasion and attempting to throw a toaster at Dad but dropping it because it was still plugged in.
ReplyDeleteGood for her, Thud!
ReplyDeleteMrs O'Blene is somewhat similar...
(She's not Irish, but the name has rather stuck on this blog, so rather than change it, it'll remain the same)!
Reevers! Ha ha ha!
ReplyDeleteMy chum in some backwater on the West coast of Ireland is always sending me this stuff too!
They usually are, Elecs!
ReplyDeleteLike those ditties too, especially the toaster!
(Have you got that electric bike yet)?