A Polish chap went to apply for a driving licence.
First, of course, he had to take an eye sight test. The optician showed him a card with the letters:
'C Z W I X N O S T A C Z.'
"Can you read this?" the optician asked.
"Read it?" the Polish chap replied, "I know the guy."
A partially sighted man went into a restaurant.
ReplyDelete"I'll have the *Pissoles*, please Waiter"
Waiter : "That's an *R*, Sir"
"Ok, I'll have the *arseholes* then"
A long one here:
ReplyDeleteMike is walking up the street meets his friend Geoff,
"High, Geoff - how're ya doin' ? It's been such a long time."
"Well, Mike - I've been to university studying a subject called Logic, I now have a degree in it."
"Logic, Geoff ? What does that entail ?"
"Let me explain, Mike. Do you have a goldfish ?"
"Yes."
"Well Mike. As you have a goldfish I presume that you have a fishpond and a garden. Am I right ?"
"Blimey, Geoff - you're spot on !"
"It doesn't stop there, Mike. You also have a family house from which I deduce that you have a wife and kids - this means that you haven't had sex for ages and you've taken to wanking again."
"Bejeesus, Geoff ! I hate to admit it but you're bang on the money with all that"
The two friends exchange pleasantries and part company. Mike walks further up the road and bumps into his friend, Chris,
"You'll never guess what, Chris. I've just bumped into Geoff and he's got himself a degree in Logic."
"Logic, Mike ? What on earth is that then ?"
"Well it goes like this, Chris. Have you got a goldfish."
"Yes I have, Mike."
"Well you're a wanker then, Chris."
All classics!
ReplyDeleteHope all is well with you guy's???
Wotcha scrobs! All well I hope?!??! Hope to be back to doing the commenting rounds of the blogs soon, I have missed my weekly dose of scroblene!
ReplyDeletePronounced zwicksnostash.
ReplyDeleteTry Gaelic- I started learning it once, but got no further than how to pronounce words.
Yes I love that one!!
ReplyDeleteDo you mind if I "borrow" that one today? I will give your linkback I promise...
Morning Gledwood!
ReplyDeleteDelighted to let you have it - and thanks for posting!
When the 10 new member states acceded to the European Union, that very same joke did the rounds. It was rapidly followed by the following:
ReplyDelete"What's your name?"
"Zwembrakalawa-Wodjieszchewa"
"How's that spelt?"
"With a hyphen".