Wednesday, 17 December 2025

Retail threnody...



It's the time of year when the disasters of the season manifest themselves in clearing every supermarket shelf of dubious spices and concoctions, foreign-sounding meat items, cheese from a species of Bulgarian sheep, and a lorry load of disliked Brussels sprouts...

I also have a fear of running out of washing-up liquid around now, and am unable to describe this syndrome - but it is already affecting me more than somewhat!

Choosing a bottle of brandy is always a pleasure, and spending ages peering at the bottom shelf in Waitrose is a worthwhile and pleasurable occupation, but what makes such a decision rely on the Poirot-style inspection of the whole shelf, the eventual choice, and somehow, without looking, a different bottle is picked up, with hardly a glance, and placed lovingly in the trolley? The same happened the other day with some sort of flavoured olive oil!

I am just thirty pounds short of my budget already, and it's still only half-way through December...


8 comments:

  1. If you are sticking firmly to budget, I foresee an interesting ‘Ready, Steady, Cook!’ situation developing around the end of December where you try to concoct dishes out of the remaining unaccustomed ingredients - odd cheeses, flavoured oils and all.

    We had a not dissimilar experience last year after the departure of assorted seasonal house guests with specific dietary requirements. (One of them left behind something impenetrably labelled ‘Vegan Block’; to this day, despite some intrepid sampling, no one is entirely sure whether it was meant to be a substitute for butter, lard, cheese or soap.)

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  2. MacHeath wrote: "something impenetrably labelled ‘Vegan Block’; to this day, despite some intrepid sampling, no one is entirely sure whether it was meant to be a substitute for butter, lard, cheese or soap"
    My argument with my granddaughter is: if it's vegan it's not cheese"

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  3. I'll heave my mega-bottle of Fairy across, to tide you over.

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  4. Unwanted flavoured olive oil? Sounds as if a fried bread experiment might be worth a try.

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  5. Mac - that is hilarious, and probably going to happen with all the stuff in the freezer, and therefore actually unwanted...

    I looked up Vegan Block, and it appears to be some sort of cross between Castrol 'R', racing car oil, (remember that gorgeous smell at Brands Hatch ?), and Dulux Weathershield! I may well pass on that delicacy...

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  6. TheJ - that is fact! I always thought Halloumi was a sort of peculiar vegan item, but a daughter recommended that I try it fried, and it is indeed rather nice, but different!

    It also 'squeaks', which sets the dog off, looking for mice...

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  7. Thank you James! I actually water down any washing-up liquid, as with my bunches of bananas, lovingly known as 'hands', I can fill a whole ground floor of an average house with soap suds, and waste gallons of water trying to find my way back to the sink... A spare bottle would be very welcome, but Tesco have come up trumps, and supplied one for the princely sum of One Pound, so I am safe until February 2026...

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  8. AK! That is genius! I'm willing to forego tweve hours of raging indigestion for a crack at a large slice of that comestible! I have actually lobbed a dollop into a home-made pizza this evening, as I read somewhere, that it'll help with 'the structure' of the said culinary masterpiece!

    If no replies to future comments are forthcoming, I suggest a call via 999 to an address in West Kent may mean some sort of recompense for any fire engine enactment...

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